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Table of Contents
Version 2.15
•
Updated February 2024
Preface
How to Read This Book
Keep This Book Alive
Introduction
Etiquette Advice
Approaching a Revolving Door
Attending a Party
Attending a Wedding
Attending Theater
Being Asked to Conform
Being Invited to Something You Don’t Want to Attend
Boarding a Plane
Drinking an Iced Beverage
Driving a Car
Getting a Compliment
Hosting a Party
Inviting a Friend to Hang Out
Jaywalking at a Half-Jog
Kissing a Girl on the Cheek
Offering Your Seat
Opening a Golf Umbrella
Planning a Group Outing
Planning to Attend a Party
Pointing
Posting a Group Photo
Riding the Subway
Saying Thank You
Sitting on Furniture
Spotting a Hazard
Standing Next to a Celebrity
Standing Next to a Woman Who Has Passed Gas
Swearing
Talking on a Cell Phone in a Checkout Line
Texting
Using a Urinal
Visiting Someone’s Home
Viewing a Photo on Someone Else’s Phone
Yawning
Dining Advice
Arriving Late for a Reservation
Beginning a Meal
Being Served a Bad Meal
Chewing
Dealing with a Bathroom Attendant
Dining Out with a Large Group
Eating Steak
Eating Oysters on the Half Shell
Finishing a Meal
Greeting Somebody While Sitting at a Table
Offering a Bite from Your Plate
Speaking to a Waiter
Trying Vegetarianism
Using Silverware
Drinking Advice
Drinking at an Office Party
Drinking Champagne
Drinking Cocktails
Feeling Hungover and Regretting Your Behavior from the Previous Night
Noticing Someone Drinking Seltzer at a Bar
Ordering Wine
Receiving a “Buy Back” or Free Drink
Sitting Alone at a Bar
Taking Up Drinking
Communication Advice
Clarifying
Emphasizing While Writing
Giving a Wedding Toast
Saying “Like” A Lot
Saying “Real”
Writing
Writing “U” Rather Than “You”
Writing an Email
Financial Advice
Gambling
Having What You Once Wanted
Hiring Movers
Making Money
Selling Something on Craigslist
Talking About Money
Using a Credit Card to Buy Something You Can’t Afford
Wanting to be Rich
Work Advice
Arriving Late to a Morning Meeting
Being Promoted
Choosing a Career
Firing Someone
Getting Good at Something
Hiring Someone
Interviewing for a Job
Looking for a Summer Job
Looking for Your First Job After College
Managing
Messing Up at Work
Starting a New Job
Thinking About Quitting a New Job
Working at an Office
Working for an Incompetent Boss
Working in Customer Service
Working While on Vacation
Working with an Inept Colleague
Travel Advice
Arriving in an European City
Booking a Vacation Hotel
Buying a Plane Ticket
Choosing Between a Funicular and the Stairs
Dressing for a Flight
Exploring a New City
Leaving for a Trip
Packing for a Trip
Planning a Ski Trip
Planning a Three-Day Weekend
Taking a Safari
Taking a Trip
Traveling
Traveling to a Foreign Country
Traveling with Your Partner
Health & Fitness Advice
Being Offered Free Food
Belonging to a Gym
Brushing Your Teeth
Drinking a Diet Coke
Feeling Full
Gaining a Little Weight
Having Seconds
Jogging on a Sidewalk
Smoking
Wanting to Feel Healthier
Wanting Washboard Abs
Style Advice
Arriving Overdressed
Assembling a Wardrobe
Buying a Pocket Square
Buying a Suit
Buying Your First Tie
Calling in Sick
Combatting Pit Stains
Doing Laundry
Getting Dressed
Leaving the House
Nailing an Outfit
Noticing How Well Older Men Dress
Shopping a Sale
Turning Up Your Collar
Tying a Straight Tie
Wearing Nothing
Wearing a Belt
Wearing a Black Suit
Wearing a Button-Down Collar
Wearing a Jersey with a Name and Number on the Back
Wearing a Lanyard
Wearing Pants
Wearing a Polo Shirt
Wearing a Spread Collar
Wearing a Tuxedo for the First Time
Wearing Hiking Sandals
Wearing Shirtsleeves Too Short for Your Jacket
Wearing Shoes
Wearing Shorts
Wearing Sunglasses
Love & Dating Advice
Asking Out a Woman and Being Rejected
Being Dumped
Buying Flowers
Dating a Woman with More Experience Than You
Falling in Love
Falling Out of Love
Getting Married
Growing Bored of Online Dating
Having a Bad Argument
Looking at an Old Photograph of Your Wife
Moving in Together
Proposing
Seeking a Soul Mate
Starting a New Relationship
Shopping for a Special Gift
Smitten with a Stranger
Thinking That a Nearby Woman is Pretty
Wanting Romantic Love
Wanting to Impress a Woman
Life Advice
Being Annoyed by a Stranger
Being Annoyed by Family or Friends
Being Proved Wrong
Being Invited to an Out-of-Town Wedding
Being Treated Like a Child
Bonding with Another Man
Caring for an Aged and Ailing Loved One
Choosing Between Right and Wrong
Comforting a Friend
Complaining
Dealing with a Death
Doing Something Wrong
Entering College
Facing Peer Pressure
Feeling Euphoric
Feeling Low
Feeling Special
Feeling Wronged
Following Politics
Having Sex for the First Time
Getting Frustrated with Your Mother
Graduating College
Knowing Something
Laughing at Someone
Listening to a Friend
Making a Hard Choice
Making a Mistake
Making a New Acquaintance
Moving to a New City
Planning a Bachelor Party
Raising a Child
Rehearsing an Argument
Rereading a Favorite Book
Turning Eighteen
Waking Up in the Morning
Wanting Something
Wanting to Improve
Trying Something Hard
Miscellaneous Advice
Being Asked Directions
Being Shown Nude Photos of a Friend’s Girlfriend
Buying a Christmas Tree
Catching a Foul Ball
Clogging a Toilet
Cooking
Eating Pistachios
Entering a Room
Furnishing Your First Apartment
Going to a Karaoke Bar
Gossiping
Having Fun
Meeting Someone New
Looking in a Mirror
Noticing a Blemish
Opening a Gift
Out-Sizing Someone
Owning a Dog
Reading the Internet
Sharing a Secret
Shaking a Handful of Nuts
Swimming
Taking a Photograph
Talking on the Phone
Thinking “I’ll Remember That”
Throwing Out a Christmas Tree
Using Social Media
Walking
Watching Fireworks
Back Pages
Acknowledgements
Colophon
A Final Word
© 2025 W.S. Cole Press
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